Single During the Holidays

Cuffing season is upon us my dear, sweet friends.

And I can tell you, quite matter of factly, that this year will be the same as most of my other years. I will be baking holiday cookies, going to look at lights, decorating for Christmas, and showing up to family Thanksgiving all by myself–and I will be doing this with great joy because Thanksgiving, Christmas, cold weather, they are my favorite things, and they will always be my favorite things, whether someone is holding my hand throughout them or not.

But I will say, this time of year can make it more difficult. Hallmark (which for some ridiculous reason, I love) parades around the idealized, absolutely ridiculous relationship–the holiday wedding, the charming small-town Christmas or the enchanting big city decorations. Nonetheless, I still enjoy the movies and magic immensely. And I will absolutely fall in love with Christmas this year again, just as I have every single year until now.

I was listening to a podcast the other day, and on this podcast, the gal was talking about how literally everything is centered around romantic love—every book, every movie, is saturated with love interests and storylines totally focused on romance. We are overwhelmed with a world of rings, fantasy weddings, and an idea that completeness has to come from romantic bliss.

Our ideas about our wholeness and the enjoyment of life are just automatically built into us as being a direct result of our relationship status. Even in shows that are supposed to revolve around action, sports, career, travel—they always resolve with romantic love. We are so overwhelmed by the ideas that everything we live and breathe for revolves around another person. And isn’t that so strange? Isn’t it so odd that we’ve been told our whole lives that our development as a person, our progress as an individual, is only possible in conjunction with hand holding and starry eyes? You are more than another person’s relationship and attention to you.

So, all that being said, I wanted to give all my sweet single friends ideas for holidays and a much-needed reminder that you are more more more than a wedding ring.

5 favorites for a single holiday season:

  1. Baking! One of my favorite alone time activities at any time of year, but especially during pumpkin season. Throw on a cute movie, put on some fun socks, take pictures of your baking endeavors, and then take some bread, cookies, muffins, rolls, whatever you so choose to create, and bring them to friends, family, or eat them on the couch under a warm blanket—you really cannot go wrong with baking.
  2. Coffee shop drinks and reads—I mean, is there anything more cozy than reading a good book, drinking some tea or coffee, and settling into a corner table in a cute local coffee shop. My favorite spot always puts up little lights and has the sweetest gift shop ever and I cannot recommend using a spot like this to get into the holiday feels.
  3. Lights lights lights! Christmas lights really cannot be beat in terms of magic and wonders—get some friends together, or just throw on your favorite coat and hat, and take a walk around local light displays. Grab a few pictures and take in the wonder because isn’t cultivating wonder what the sweet traditions of the upcoming holidays all about?
  4. Outfit Update—go shopping for a new seasonal outfit. It doesn’t have to be anything crazy or expensive, but set aside a few bucks to get something new for yourself to enjoy all your holiday living in a cute, cozy sweater dress (or whatever else you may choose to get)!
  5. Make a holiday bucket list! We all have things we love about the holidays—traditions we enjoy, ways we like to decorate, places we want to go—and making a list of things you love and want to do makes the holidays even more fun and memorable!

Remember, you are loved, you are worthy of living a fulfilled and lovely life, and I hope you have the most lovely last couple months of the year.


With Love,


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