My hair and nails are killing it, my Instagram has the perfect theme, and I’m getting photography jobs left and right while also finding time to put together absolutely perfect blog posts every other day.
I want to look like I’m put together. I want people to look at me and think, “she’s definitely got it together”, and boy do I not.
That first sentence is far from anything that describes my life, and to be honest, I really wish it wasn’t. Because really want to be well put together.
You feel that?
That inner feeling pushing you to make your life look good, to try all you can to “get it together”. Just attempting to make it look like you are in with the times and on top of things. You have a cohesive identity made for yourself. You can pick three words that perfectly describe you. You are satisfied completely with the decorations in your home, there is no clutter in your closet, and everything is very under control.
That sounds really great.
But, each step closer I get to being more “put together” I see something else I need to change or get fixed before I can actually look put together.
“There are all sorts of things in this world that offer to give it to you, but they never quite keep their promise.”
– C.S. Lewis –
The world promises us control over how our lives go, and then completely betrays us with tragedy, addiction, and unhealthy coping.
We love feeling like we have things under control though, so the world tempts us with a false opportunity to keep our emotions in check and fantastic. We want to consistently be caught in that awe feeling, that wonder feeling. Which is funny to me because awe and wonder are completely uncontrollable experiences. Awe cannot be created on command. There is this intense desire in us to satisfy a feeling and then keep it forever.
Once again, the unarguably wise C.S. Lewis expresses this rather perfectly, “The longings which arise in us when we first fall in love, or first think of some foreign country, or first take up some subject that excites us, are longings which no marriage, no travel, no learning, can really satisfy… There was something we grasped at, in that first moment of longing, which just fades away in the reality.”
And that, my dear friends, is what I know to be the reality of trying to make my life perfect in appearance, relationships, vibe, the list goes on.
Guys, we have been roped in to believing mundane, earthly things can satisfy a heavenly longing.
That those inklings of eternity that dance in and through us can possibly be persisted through looking a certain way or being with the “right” person. But it’s a Heaven thing – it’s not satisfied now, but it’s a necessary thing to hold on to because without it, we are left without hope. For we have found nothing else to fulfill us. The only thing I’ve found capable of answering my longing is eternal in every way.
Ecclesiastes 3:11 says, “He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.”
So, we have eternity set in our hearts, and we try to satisfy it with temporary, earth things.
The closest I have come to holding on to awe has been in being surrounded by hope that comes with looking forward to the eternal.
We have a thirst for Heaven that can only be satisfied, not shockingly, with Heaven.
So in those moments where we are chasing feelings and earthly ideals, pause and consider all that is to come, and the things being chased in this world will appear much smaller.
WE ARE CALLED TO CHANGE THE WORLD, BUT WE CAN’T CHANGE IT BY CHASING IT.
“Aim at heaven and you will get earth thrown in. Aim at earth and you get neither.”
– C.S. Lewis –